The Positivity Guide

thepositivityguidePositive thinking has for a long time been an interest of researchers who have proved its powerful effects. Barbara Fredrickson is one of numerous Professors of Psychology whose research focused on positivity. She published her discovery in a 2011 report that can you read in full here. Nevertheless, however beneficial it may be, positivity takes time and practice. This practice may require introspective work and other resources such as therapy.



In life, we may at times find ourselves at difficult positions, encountering a variety of problems whether they be from an internal or external source. Some ways to change them may or may not occur. In the latter case, getting into a mindset that substantially provides you a positive outlook is a solution.

Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), although scientifically discredited, is a method to change behavioral patterns in order to observe things through an optimistic lens. Created by the self-help trainers Richard Bandler and John Grinder in the 1970’s, it is based on the thesis that neurological process (neuro), language (linguistic) and behavioral patterns learned through experience (programming) are interconnected and can thus be controlled and altered in order to achieve specific goals in life. Numerous books tackling the subject have been published, among the most popular are the ones that include exercises for a more personal and unique approach. 

Positivity can also emerge from our tiniest actions and needs to be cultivated, so here is a guide to positivity created all by myself just for you! 


“Some people grumble that roses have thorns; I am grateful that thorns have roses.”




1.Ban toxic people from your life. Anyone who wants to make you feel bad about yourself doesn’t belong in your life. Evaluate your relationship to make sure of who’s toxic and who is not.
2. Surround yourself with positive people. No negative energy allowed.
3. Help other people doing random tasks and reach out when you need a hand.


4. Indulge in things you love. Find your passion. Wear your passion.
5. Start a gratitude journal. Pick it up everyday, or at least every week. List your accomplishments in it, too. Navigate through the pages once in a while.
6. Start a dream journal. Escape into your subconscious.
7. Write in a journal whether it be about your day, your plans, your doubts, your dreams or anything that makes you happy or unhappy.
8. Practice mindfulness and relaxation through activities like yoga and meditation, or any other sports.


9. Ban comparison. Softly pinch your arm every time you find yourself comparing yourself to others or comparing other people.
10. Smile more. At anything and anyone.
11. Attempt at looking at things through another lens. Seek the positive, the beautiful. Forget about the cons, focus on the pros.
12. Avoid negative media including tabloids or magazines that are comparison and bashing-inclined.
13. Laugh, laugh, laugh. Never refrain yourself. Watch this for instance.
14. Use positive phrasing. Positive thinking and positive phrasing go hand in hand.
15. Celebrate yourself…

… as in the first section of “Song Of Myself” (Leaves of Grass, 1855), Walt Whitman states:




I’ve asked a few people to tell me about their daily habits to live a more positive life, here’s their insights (you can visit their blogs by clicking their picture).



I’m someone who used to focus a lot on negative things, which caused me to worry way too much about everything in life. In order to feel happier and get a more positive mindset, I try to remind myself of all the good things around me. One of the ways I do this is by keeping a positivity journal. Every evening I write down a few lines about something positive that happened to me that day. It can be anything, ranging from getting a raise at work to watching a movie with my boyfriend. I also take note of how the experience made me feel and what my thoughts were. This technique forces me to think about all the nice moments from that day, writing down the memory helps me remember it better and analysing the moment makes me realise how big of an impact it actually had on my life.

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I am keeping myself on positive wave with yoga and workouts. I like to challenging myself and see the progress, because one of the greatest moments is realizing that few weeks ago your body couldn´t do what it just did. Trough my sport sessions I can relax, separate my thoughts and priorities and think about everything beautiful on this world. After this, I am so proud on myself, which I think is very important step to positive thinking. So go and do something which you’ll be proud of.

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Sarah-3Failure is not defined as the presence of negativity but rather the absence of positivity. Many are times when we hope for the best but still expect the worst hence maintaining a positive mindset is never that easy. Once you know that ‘EVERY OPPORTUNITY HAS A DIFFICULTY AND EVERY DIFFICULTY HAS AN OPPORTUNITY,’ you will be reminding yourself that not everything is meant to go as planned what counts is your mentality towards the situation and how you bounce back after failing.

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Sarah-2Staying positive while homeschooling a high spirited five year old, homemaking, and blogging can be a challenge. When I feel down I take a break and do something easy and fun with my husband and daughter for a change of scenery. We go to the zoo all the time. We enjoy going to church together. I think that getting enough exercise is really important for staying in a good mood, too. Coffee or tea, under a blanket, with a good book is also a great way to calm down and reset.


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For me, in order to begin my day with a positive mind I must wake up ealier, rather than later, so that I can achieve more. I have to make my day worthwhile, but giving myself many rewards in the process (definitely a must for saying positive!) Additionally, every morning, I always read a motivational quote, which gets me feeling ready for the day from the word ‘go’! Furthermore, due to my massive love of art and crafts, I ended up painting my favourite quote, ‘Shoot for the Moon. Even if you Miss, You’ll Land Among the Stars!’, up on my bedroom wall, so that it is a constant reminder, helping me stay positive and upbeat all day long!




I’ve created a printable Positivity Guide just for you, which includes the manifesto to pin on your wall, sheets to practice daily journalling and notes to give away anonymously. You can download it HERE and download the manifesto in a smaller size by clicking the image, make sure to print it out!  ➔

Tell me what you think of this Positivity Guide!

What are your daily habits for a positive life? Have you ever tried some NLP exercises? Can you suggest us any self-help books to read? 

giulia (3)




© Photograph & pictures by me.




  1. Truly inspirational. I too believe that writing down our feelings helps us overcome them but I had been making up excuses lately but thank you for this reminder. Well done!

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